21 August 2012

On Rap and Graduation

The Self-Hating Analyst

Pulling apart hip-hop (rap?) and analyzing the lyrics is beyond cliche. I know that. I do!

And I've stayed out of it for so long in spite of there being so much content. But I can't do it anymore. 

That said, I'd like to highlight some selections from Birthday Song by 2 Chainz (feat. Kanye West) because they are absurd and incredible.

The Hook

"...All I want for my birthday is a big booty girl
All I want for my birthday is a big booty girl
When I die, bury me inside the Gucci store
When I die, bury me inside the Louie store
All I want for my birthday is a big booty girl 
All I want for my birthday is a big booty girl..."
There's something kind of naive about wanting to be buried inside of a Gucci store. What exactly is 2 Chainz picturing? Is he going to be inside a glass coffin like Lenin? Or is this one of those Pharaonic burials where 2 Chainz is entombed inside of a Louis Vuitton store, surrounded by all of the luxury leather goods and screaming salespeople (and terrified customers?) he'll need in the afterlife? I'm not sure that he's attained "buried with servants" status but as far as I know, his career has not yet peaked. Fingers crossed!

Selected Verses

"...You the realest nigga breathin’ if I hold my breath..."
That's pretty good. See 'cause he's the realest but if he holds his breath then you're the realest. It's a throwaway line but it's pretty good.

Enter the Kanye

Kanye's here too. And every word written about what a pompous ass he is seems to be true. And while I don't agree on exchange rate for a menage a trois (discussed below) I can't help but nod my head when he says:

"...Ya’ll been together ten years, you deserve a menage 
‘Specially if you put that BMW in the garage 
‘Specially if you paid a couple payments on her mamma crib 
Weren’t you at her niece’s graduation? Man, I hate those kids..."

That's awesome. I hate graduation ceremonies. I know you're there for the graduator and you're showing support but... damn. They're so bad. 

Having participated in them pre and post iPhone I can say conclusively that my elaborate daydreams involving ripping stadium chairs out of the floor and throwing them around via telekinesis have fallen in proportion to the amount of shit I can do on my iPhone. I really hate graduations. Kanye and I seem to agree on that point - and probably on no other points.

"...When I die, bury me inside the booty club..."
This is even more ridiculous than being buried inside of a retail store. Is the club operational when he's buried there? I'd like to think that he'll be encased in acrylic and integrated into the main stage somehow because otherwise it would just be a coffin sitting in the middle of a strip club. And that's a real downer. There is of course the "seal it up with everyone inside" Egyptian dynastic tactic but again, that's even more of a downer on account of so many other people would be dying with him.

In Closing

A big part of rap is braggadocio. Who can use the most superlatives? Who can prove, lyrically, that they are indeed the realest, richest, and baddest there ever was or will be? 

Usually you can just pick a category and say "I am the most". 

That's not quite right 'cause otherwise my song "I Am The Most Boats and Cars" would be topping the charts but I think the general sentiment is accurate.

We're at a point where 2 Chainz and Kanye are comparing themselves, in death, to the Pharoahs. That's a pretty big claim. I feel like extra points should be awarded for creativity and so I include it here. The obvious comparisons drawn from the Judeo-Christian religions are just that - obvious. You can say you're bigger than God but that's cheating (looking at you, Jay-Z). You can make yourself a Christ figure but that's played out and again, cheating (Na$). That's just saying you're so awesome that you're infinity awesome. 

It takes a little more creativity to say that you're bigger than ancient Egypt. 

Also though, it's refreshingly real to hear someone say that they hate graduation. Hate it! There's a moment of Louis C.K. honesty in that one line and it's enough to make me stop hating Kanye enough to listen to this one thing he has to say before I go back to wondering why he's such a complete dick at all times.

Full lyrics at: http://www.killerhiphop.com/2-chainz-birthday-song-lyrics-kanye-west/#ixzz23oKF9SnF

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